A Bedtime Story – Finding the JOY in Caregiving for one with Alzheimer’s
Guest story by Marion Riley
My husband, Don, was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 1992.
Don was sixty-seven years old and we had been married for forty-six years. We had many happy years together, we traveled a lot and, most of all, we enjoyed our grandchildren.
Don is an easygoing person with a quiet demeanor.
When he said or did anything out of the ordinary, I had a hard time with it at first, but I knew I had to accept his condition.
As the Alzheimer’s progressed, Don would do really odd and funny things.
He had been getting up at night and wouldn’t come back to bed.
One predawn morning at about 3:00, he decided to get up.
I was so tired of getting up with him each time, I stayed in bed and begged him, “Don, please come back to bed.”
He was reluctant, yet as he crawled back into bed, he replied, “I don’t think my wife would appreciate me going to bed with you!”
Marion Riley was a caregiver to her husband, Don, who lived with dementia. When she could no longer manage his care, she moved him into a skilled nursing facility, where he soon became a hit with the ladies. It was hard for Marion to see her husband of fifty-six years and the father of their five children, smiling while holding hands with another resident. Alzheimer’s disease makes people do inexplicable things.
The Executive Director of The Caregiver’s Voice took a liberty with turning Don’s hat sideways prior to taking their photo (much to Marion’s dismay.) 😉 (TCV Ed.)
Story from Finding the JOY in Alzheimer’s: Caregivers Share the JOYful Times.
A touching story.
Marie as well was not a violent person and did things that just were not her.
I had to accept the disease was what caused some very unusual actions.
Although, since losing her I would deal with them very willingly if I could just have her back. It’s been 4 months now and I realize she is not coming back.
I am being interviewed by the Associate Director of Movement Disorder clinic of Georgetown as they are interested in the timeline and what I did to deal with the progress.This will help them deal with situations.
Oh do I have plenty to tell them. I feel honored they reached out to me. It’s funny that LBD is not mentioned anymore but just Parkinson’s. That trial is still not in full speed ahead. Thanks FDA, I blame you for me losing my loved one.
Marion, I am impressed with all that you did.
I know it must have been hard to put Don in a home and watching the activities that took place. But, I am pleased to see that you knew it was the disease and not Don. I had to say that so many many times to myself.
Marie and I were together for 50 years. Boy do I miss her.
Don, thank YOU for sharing and congratulations on the Georgetown interview.
I wonder why LBD is not a focus as one of the causes of dementia.
I believe it was the Program Director of the LBDA (assoc.) who said, Lewy Body dementia walks like Parkinson’s and talks like Alzheimer’s.
I’ll share your message with Marion. She’ll be ninety this August!